Gastro Gnome - Eat Better Wherever

Have you ever been accused of..

When I was 19, I was in Reno and cops drew their guns down on me for watching wild ducks in a city reservoir.
Just south of there, in Gardnerville, I used to do more than just watch the ducks in the city park. I would feed them, lure them nearby, then catch and eat them for dinner. Good thing the Douglas County police did not follow the same protocols of the Reno police.

But, that is another story for another day.
 
Just south of there, in Gardnerville, I used to do more than just watch the ducks in the city park. I would feed them, lure them nearby, then catch and eat them for dinner. Good thing the Douglas County police did not follow the same protocols of the Reno police.

But, that is another story for another day.
I was passing through on a Greyhound bus and on the way to the station I saw wild ducks on a reservoir. Knowing that I had several hours to kill before catching my next bus, I walked over to the reservoir to watch them. They were not park ducks and the the water was behind a cyclone fence. I had to belly crawl to the edge where I layed there watching them. Behind me were some business buildings and apparently someone saw me in their security camera and called in "suspicious behavior " Just never imagined that the cops would react like that, I thought they were going to shoot me.
During their questioning one cop asked me "What type of ducks did you see ? and I responded " Shovelors, Wigeon, and some Scaup" and then he nods to to his partner as to say "He's not lying".
 
We are very remote. How exactly would you react if unknowns were shining spotlights across your property? Homes generally can't be seen from roadways in the daylight. Forget about seeing anything at night. There's no law enforcement of any kind within 2 hours. If you spotlight me , I'm going to send out a couple warning shots. They got a valid warning. It hasn't happened again
Stupid is a stupid does.
 
Was bowhunting after school one evening. Changing into my hunting clothes in a field entrance When a woman (who we all knew locally and is beyond Karen, picture the landlord from kingpin) stopped me and asked what I was doing. I replied "going deer hunting". She started screaming not on my property your not". Yes that's been my plan all along put on all these clothes and heavy rubber boots. Then jump two chain link fences and run across four lanes of I-90. Then across the neighbors 80 to get to your property🙄. That was one of several interactions in the area. She went through a lot of mailboxes in those days.
 
Was bowhunting after school one evening. Changing into my hunting clothes in a field entrance When a woman (who we all knew locally and is beyond Karen, picture the landlord from kingpin) stopped me and asked what I was doing. I replied "going deer hunting". She started screaming not on my property your not". Yes that's been my plan all along put on all these clothes and heavy rubber boots. Then jump two chain link fences and run across four lanes of I-90. Then across the neighbors 80 to get to your property🙄. That was one of several interactions in the area. She went through a lot of mailboxes in those days.
Normally I would chastise the mailbox thump, but in this case I'm 39 years old and would like to go thump it tonight.
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Thousands of people a year take a three-day rafting trip down the wild and scenic section of the Rogue River and there are several popular camping spots along the river. One day my buddy and I made the long hike along the river to a good salmon fishing hole directly adjacent to one of these spots. It got late in the day, and we were relaxing on the beach directly across from the camp site before starting the long hike out. A large group of rafters showed up and pulled into the site to camp for the night. They had a banner saying they were some sort of church youth group. They were all teenagers and young adults.

The young ladies were modest so two of them would hold up a towel while a third would change from her swimsuit into her regular clothes behind it. Then they would trade off so another could change. This kept up until all were changed. The purpose of this ritual seemed to be to keep the boys from catching a glimpse of their fine, perfectly tanned, nubile bodies but apparently nobody noticed the two dudes on the other side of the river with binoculars.

So even though I was never accused of being a peeping Tom, I guess I was one.
 
I’ve never been accused of being a peeping Tom, but I had a run in with a local guy who wasn’t at the time but we’ll say is now in wildlife law enforcement.

My brother and I were checking cows about midnight one night, spotlighting around looking for any cows dropping calves, as we leave, there’s a vehicle in the field entrance. As I get closer cherries pop on. I think no big deal until a 4’ trooper with a 5’ gun popped out and started barking orders. I complied, he pulled my little brother out and threw him into the snow. The guy that wasn’t law at the time started going through my truck so I threw him into the snowbank. Long and short was words were exchanged and the trooper took offense to me telling him he had little man syndrome after he got rough with my little brother. I went to the county jail, no charges filed. The guy who wasn’t a cop didn’t know who I was and his father had a lot of business with part of my family that was terminated. So a lot of nonsense came from 1 dufus and some hot tempers.

Getting my guns back was the biggest PITA.

Plus if I ever come across the guy that caused the mess I’m punching him square in the nose immediately. He’ll know why.
 
I was archery hunting in VA about 20 miles from the capitol. I had a lady approach my stand with a camera filming me. She said she had seen my trail camera and that she was sure I was trying to get nude pictures of her. She was probably in her late 60s and was really pissed. My camera was about 500 yards from her house and pointed towards a fence pinch point (about a 90° angle from her house). She was super mad and kept taking pictures/video. She was absolutely pissed that I was hunting and claimed numerous people had gutted deer within 10 feet of her back window. I was in a legal hunt area and she kept screaming at me that she was sure I was trying to see her naked. She then said she thought I would hit one of her horses that were 300 plus yards from the stand. As I climbed down from my tree stand, she started scream that she felt threatened and that I was going to assault her. I had turned on he video on my phone to make sure I got everything.

I was hunting in an archery program in a VA County and it was run by the Police Department. I called the PD contact and he said he knew her well and that she felt the uninhabited county property belonged to her. Her house was probably worth more than 4 million. The PD SGT said that she had a run-in every year with somebody but she had finally gone too far. I sent the PD my GPS coordinates and they later had a talk with her. They told her she was not allowed off the trails on the county property and only the hunters were. She was warned that if she had anymore adverse interactions with the hunts she would be charged with trespassing and hunter harassment. She was even given a warning citation.

Now the funny part…her neighbor heard all the commotion and came out to see what was going on. She was mid 40s and a really nice person (not bad looking). She said the neighbor lady was crazy and that I was in a legal hunting area. She went on to say that the deer eat all her bushes/flowers and she wants them thinned out. Right in front of the crazy lady, she invited me and my hunting group to hunt her property. The crazy lady went ballistic and said she would complain to the PD because that would put hunters even closer to her house.

We hunted there all year. The nice lady would bring out coffee and doughnuts when we were done hunting for the morning. She and her husband were exceptionally nice and really appreciated the hunters taking out the deer. My group took 10 deer that year off the neighbors property. On any given morning she had 30 plus deer moving through her yard.

I kept hunting the original spot because it was so good. Every year I was in DC I hunted that spot and my hunting group called my spot “crazy lady ridge!” We all shared stands and hunted as a group and I still get texts from the guys when they get a good buck from “crazy lady ridge”.
 
Just south of there, in Gardnerville, I used to do more than just watch the ducks in the city park. I would feed them, lure them nearby, then catch and eat them for dinner. Good thing the Douglas County police did not follow the same protocols of the Reno police.

But, that is another story for another day.
A former hunting celebrity/call manufacturer got some time in the federal pen for that, among a lot of other stuff.
 
I’ve never been accused of being a peeping Tom, but I had a run in with a local guy who wasn’t at the time but we’ll say is now in wildlife law enforcement.

My brother and I were checking cows about midnight one night, spotlighting around looking for any cows dropping calves, as we leave, there’s a vehicle in the field entrance. As I get closer cherries pop on. I think no big deal until a 4’ trooper with a 5’ gun popped out and started barking orders. I complied, he pulled my little brother out and threw him into the snow. The guy that wasn’t law at the time started going through my truck so I threw him into the snowbank. Long and short was words were exchanged and the trooper took offense to me telling him he had little man syndrome after he got rough with my little brother. I went to the county jail, no charges filed. The guy who wasn’t a cop didn’t know who I was and his father had a lot of business with part of my family that was terminated. So a lot of nonsense came from 1 dufus and some hot tempers.

Getting my guns back was the biggest PITA.

Plus if I ever come across the guy that caused the mess I’m punching him square in the nose immediately. He’ll know why.
Let me see if I got this straight. It's calving season, February or March. You live in cattle ranching country. You're out checking for cows in trouble calving at night. I mean, cows don't always wait till daylight to go into labor (seems to me they wait till the middle of the night more often than not). You're checking with a spotlight while driving around inside a warm pickup cab, which is what most every rancher prefers over freezing his arse off riding a horse with kerosene lantern in subzero temps. How many farm trucks in that country DON'T have a spotlight attached. And what freaking Dick Tracy figures a rancher who owns scores if not hundreds of walking prime rib is going to shoot a scrawny deer in the middle of the night long after its horns have fallen off? Wow! How did that cop ever get a driver's license? Or learn to tie his shoes?
 
A former hunting celebrity/call manufacturer got some time in the federal pen for that, among a lot of other stuff.
But the geese killed in that Colorado city park were just left to rot on the spot after their legs were cut off for the bird bands. Big Fin at least ate the meat. I don't believe the feds got a conviction for that. I suspect Foiles claimed he bought the bands on his lanyard. The feds on both sides of the border busted him for a bunch of other stuff that was easier to prove, like too many rounds in the shotgun, cruelty to animals, too many birds, etc. Easier to prove because the idiot filmed it!
 
But the geese killed in that Colorado city park were just left to rot on the spot after their legs were cut off for the bird bands. Big Fin at least ate the meat. I don't believe the feds got a conviction for that. I suspect Foiles claimed he bought the bands on his lanyard. The feds on both sides of the border busted him for a bunch of other stuff that was easier to prove, like too many rounds in the shotgun, cruelty to animals, too many birds, etc. Easier to prove because the idiot filmed it!
Like I said, among other things. And by no means did I mean to seem like I was comparing @bigfin to Jeff foiles.
 
Let me see if I got this straight. It's calving season, February or March. You live in cattle ranching country. You're out checking for cows in trouble calving at night. I mean, cows don't always wait till daylight to go into labor (seems to me they wait till the middle of the night more often than not). You're checking with a spotlight while driving around inside a warm pickup cab, which is what most every rancher prefers over freezing his arse off riding a horse with kerosene lantern in subzero temps. How many farm trucks in that country DON'T have a spotlight attached. And what freaking Dick Tracy figures a rancher who owns scores if not hundreds of walking prime rib is going to shoot a scrawny deer in the middle of the night long after its horns have fallen off? Wow! How did that cop ever get a driver's license? Or learn to tie his shoes?
He said I was shining trees to shoot coons. Seen me doing it from 6 miles away apparently. 😂
 
Was bowhunting after school one evening. Changing into my hunting clothes in a field entrance When a woman (who we all knew locally and is beyond Karen, picture the landlord from kingpin) stopped me and asked what I was doing. I replied "going deer hunting". She started screaming not on my property your not". Yes that's been my plan all along put on all these clothes and heavy rubber boots. Then jump two chain link fences and run across four lanes of I-90. Then across the neighbors 80 to get to your property🙄. That was one of several interactions in the area. She went through a lot of mailboxes in those days.

Oh the old mailbox thump. A kid I went to high school with’s mom had the most heinous looking cow mailbox and it embarrassed him so badly that one night after a kegger, he went and stole his own family’s mailbox, and let his parents think that it was some other group of kids.
To make matters worse, a snowplow driver found it a few months later, where he ditched it with the address still on it, and delivered it back to her front door!
 
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