Sh*t our kids do

[WildWill]

Me texting @Dsnow9 for parenting advice…

Fathercould on Instagram: "🚨Dad Hack🚨 @mothercould isn’t the only one with the hacks 😂 Credit: @thedadbodlawn"

80K likes, 1,507 comments - fathercould on March 9, 2023: "🚨Dad Hack🚨 @mothercould isn’t the only one with the hacks 😂 Credit: @thedadbodlawn".

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Seriously though you gotta have a freaking engineering degree to get those carseats in and out. Also apparently kids have to stay in a booster seat till they reach the age of 32. My boy turns 8 in April is like 4"9 and almost 80lb my wife still think he needs in a booster.

 

[Bc1992]

Just walked outside in my underwear to throw some trash away and turned around to see the 3 year old come outside naked, close the door, and start laughing. I asked if he locked it and he just started grinning which instantly turned into screaming when I told him we would have to wait on momma to get off work and get home before we could get inside... luckily I had my sleeping bag in my truck I could put him in while I figured out a way to get inside.

 

[Deleted member 28227]

Seriously though you gotta have a freaking engineering degree to get those carseats in and out. Also apparently kids have to stay in a booster seat till they reach the age of 32. My boy turns 8 in April is like 4"9 and almost 80lb my wife still think he needs in a booster.

Not casting blame… but the LATCH system was invented in Canada sooooo…

 

[Nick87]

Seriously though you gotta have a freaking engineering degree to get those carseats in and out. Also apparently kids have to stay in a booster seat till they reach the age of 32. My boy turns 8 in April is like 4"9 and almost 80lb my wife still think he needs in a booster.

#*^@#* those car seats!!

 

[Gellar]

Seriously though you gotta have a freaking engineering degree to get those carseats in and out. Also apparently kids have to stay in a booster seat till they reach the age of 32. My boy turns 8 in April is like 4"9 and almost 80lb my wife still think he needs in a booster.

Getting carseats in and out is easy…taking the covers off, washing and getting them back on is another story.

 

[WildWill]

Not casting blame… but the LATCH system was invented in Canada sooooo…

Figures.

 

[WildWill]

Getting carseats in and out is easy…taking the covers off, washing and getting them back on is another story.

At a certain point those things get so nasty fires about the only true way to clean one.

 

[Gellar]

At a certain point those things get so nasty fires about the only true way to clean one.

Both of our kids liked to get carsick. I got good at changing clothes on the side of the road and taking the car seat apart when we got home. The power washer works good.

One Sunday night we were coming home from a weekend road trip. It was around 9:30 or 10 and one of the kids got sick about 45 minutes from home. We were on the side of the road cleaning everything and a state trooper pulled in behind us probably thinking he was going to get a DUI. All he can see is my butt sticking out of the door and a puke covered car seat on the shoulder of the road. He stands up out of his squad and hollers is everything ok? And I just reply no, can you help clean up puke? The officer got back in his car and left.

 

[220yotekiller]

Here he is sampling the dog's water
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Looks like he's decided to be a mechanic and be slowly driven insane like his dad..
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that's awesome

 

[BackofBeyond]

Long time listener first time caller here, gave my daughter a bath last night. Was carrying her the 5 feet to the changing table to put on a diaper and she shit right in my hand.

Core memory for sure.

Wife looked me in the eye and deadpanned "She's just asserting her dominance".

Wait until she’s old enough to be in the tub unsupervised and drops a floater in there as soon as you leave…

 

[Deleted member 52098]

Seriously though you gotta have a freaking engineering degree to get those carseats in and out. Also apparently kids have to stay in a booster seat till they reach the age of 32. My boy turns 8 in April is like 4"9 and almost 80lb my wife still think he needs in a booster.

dude... I have this discussion with my wife constantly. Our little one could easily leave a car seat and she is almost nine. Im just going to start wrapping her in bubble wrap and skip the booster seat; my daughter will think its awesome, my wife might file for divorce

 

[fowladdict]

dude... I have this discussion with my wife constantly. Our little one could easily leave a car seat and she is almost nine. Im just going to start wrapping her in bubble wrap and skip the booster seat; my daughter will think its awesome, my wife might file for divorce

I swear they go from a booster seat to a learner's permit overnight!

 

[Gellar]

Wait until she’s old enough to be in the tub unsupervised and drops a floater in there as soon as you leave…

And tries to stuff it down the drain so no one knows that shat in the tub.

 

[Nick87]

And tries to stuff it down the drain so no one knows that shat in the tub.

That's my trick

 

[millerkiller77]

That's my trick

Waffle stomp, a classic maneuver

 

[brockel]

Tonight my 3 year old tells me she wants to be a cowgirl. 30 seconds later she hits her hand really hard and she’s about to cry and I quickly say “cowgirls don’t cry”. So she grits her teeth not to cry and instead she says “damn that hurt”. Guess I deserve that one

 

[WildWill]

Oh my God this is so bad it's entertaining. My daughters a rose and my boys a weed they got it half right.

 

[Aperventure]

Truffles with just middle sucked out

I wish I loved anything as much as my kids love taking one bite out of an apple and setting it on the table and walking away.

 

[NAHMINT]

Not casting blame… but the LATCH system was invented in Canada sooooo…

Seen the t.v. commercial, MY COUSIN from BOSTON ''!!!

 

[Wild Bill]

Our almost 2 month old had his best night sleep yet, last night. Our 2-1/2 year old on the other hand was up at 1:00, 2:30, 3:30, and 4:30. He thought it was really fun and loved running around the house back and forth from his room to ours while all the lights were off. Had the urge to snort some Pike's Place grounds before I made a pot. Going to be feeling it later today.