I’ve found several great uses for toilet paper

Anyone else use KirlandTM brand two-ply toilet paper to gently dab tears from their eyes whenever they think of the international/global/new-world-order case of Anglophobia and western European cultural hatred, commercially speaking? Just me?
 
I know these threads are terrible but it’s not worth it man.
 
I really like the Kirkland Signature brand because you’ll note they actually spell out the name.

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Too many companies have stopped doing this because of communist/social advances. It’s probably from eating animals that don’t solely eat vegetables. See the Black Rifle Communist Coffee Company symbol?

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Look at the workmanship on this embossing. Is your toilet paper this neat?

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Here I thought it was just for pooping and for stuffing in my boots when camping to dry them over night.
 
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