MarvB
Well-known member
The wife typically wants to drag me about when she goes shopping so I, over the course of the past few months, devised a plan to at least have a bit of fun while she is polishing the plastic....feel free to use any of these! hump
1. Jan 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly
put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. Jan 25: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go
off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Feb 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading
to the rest rooms.
4. Feb 17: Walked up to an employee and told her in an
official tone 'Code 3' in housewares.....and watched what
happened.
5. Feb 23: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put
a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Mar 1: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Mar 10: Set up a tent in the camping department
and told other shoppers they're invited if they'll bring
pillows from the bedding department.
8. Mar 17: When a clerk asks if they "can help you",
pretend to cry and ask "Why can't you people just leave
me alone?"
9. Mar 30: Looked right into the security camera; used
it as a mirror, and picked my nose.
10. Apr 10: While handling guns in the hunting
department, asked the clerk if he knows where the
antidepressants are.
11. Apr 13: Darted around the store suspiciously
loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. Apr 20: In the auto department, practiced
"Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Apr 26: Hid in a clothing rack and when people
browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. May 7: When an announcement came over the
loud speaker, assumed the fetal position and scream "NO! NO!
It's those voices again!!!
(And; last, but not least!)
15. May 13: Went into a fitting room, shut the door
and waited a while; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is
no toilet paper in here!"
1. Jan 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly
put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. Jan 25: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go
off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Feb 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading
to the rest rooms.
4. Feb 17: Walked up to an employee and told her in an
official tone 'Code 3' in housewares.....and watched what
happened.
5. Feb 23: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put
a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Mar 1: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Mar 10: Set up a tent in the camping department
and told other shoppers they're invited if they'll bring
pillows from the bedding department.
8. Mar 17: When a clerk asks if they "can help you",
pretend to cry and ask "Why can't you people just leave
me alone?"
9. Mar 30: Looked right into the security camera; used
it as a mirror, and picked my nose.
10. Apr 10: While handling guns in the hunting
department, asked the clerk if he knows where the
antidepressants are.
11. Apr 13: Darted around the store suspiciously
loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. Apr 20: In the auto department, practiced
"Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Apr 26: Hid in a clothing rack and when people
browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. May 7: When an announcement came over the
loud speaker, assumed the fetal position and scream "NO! NO!
It's those voices again!!!
(And; last, but not least!)
15. May 13: Went into a fitting room, shut the door
and waited a while; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is
no toilet paper in here!"
