What's up with Texans in the GYE?

​

How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
-None. Californians screw in hot tubs.

Who can use the women’s room in CA?
-Not women as they conform to a gender which is a form of hate.

Does this iced mocha latte whip come fair trade? Yes, it’s a fair $4 USD trade for that coffee.
 
I will pile on and say I just got back from taking the family out to Teton and Yellowstone and every crazy ass, impatient driver I dealt with in the park and on the race road from Cody to Casper did have Texas plates. The only exception was an older lady in a tiny white hatchback w/ Wyoming plates that must have had that thing tuned by the Fast and Furious crowd. Was witness to 3 almost head on collisions in the passing lane.

People moving and ruining the last best place has been going on forever.

Growing up I swore I was leaving Iowa ASAP. Took a year off college and went out to work a year in Winter Park. Decided if I didn't leave after that ski season ended I never would. Looking at what's happened to Granby I'm glad I wasn't around to watch it. Through college I spent 3 summers in Vermont. Did my internship there and was offered a job. Looking around at the living situation we decided we couldn't make it work. Word on the street back then was all the NR landowners were pushing up the cost of living. Came back to Iowa to regroup and never left. I couldn't be happier. I just wish we could have kept our deer hunting a secret.
 
Three dudes bellied up to the trough pisser in a bar:

First due finishes up, washes his hands thoroughly, dries them meticulously. "At the Univeristy of Texas, they teach us how to clean ourselves properly."

Second dude finishes up, used just a dab of water, and a dab of soap, then rises with the smallest amount of water possible. "At UC Berkley, we are taught to conserve water."

Third dude finishes up, zips his pants and walks out. On his way he looks over his shoulder and says "At the University of Montana, they taught not to piss on ourselves."
 
Ben Lamb said:
Three dudes bellied up to the trough pisser in a bar:

First due finishes up, washes his hands thoroughly, dries them meticulously. "At the Univeristy of Texas, they teach us how to clean ourselves properly."

Second dude finishes up, used just a dab of water, and a dab of soap, then rises with the smallest amount of water possible. "At UC Berkley, we are taught to conserve water."

Third dude finishes up, zips his pants and walks out. On his way he looks over his shoulder and says "At the University of Montana, they taught not to piss on ourselves."
Click to expand...
Fourth guy walks in, washes his hands and then commences taking a leak. As the other three look at him in bewilderment, he says “I can’t believe y’all touch yourselves with dirty hands.” 😂
 
Benfromalbuquerque said:
Hey! Too far, man, too far. Sheep deserve respect and I do hope you’ll consider the feelings of animals in the future.
Click to expand...

There was a huge town hall meeting in Rawlins in the 80's. Subject was coyote predation on livestock, and trying to find solutions. The presenters invited the Sierra Club representative to come and talk about non-lethal management options rather than poison & trapping, etc. They guy gave his talk, and it centered around emerging research on coyote reduction habits, possible disruption of estrus & what happens when increase lethal pressure is applied, leading to multiple litters per year, rather than just 1. There was a significant push by the Sierra Club presenter to further fund research on coyote birth control options like the RU-486 pill delivered through M-44 guns (typically used for cyanide delivery, coyote tugs on a bait, and a puff of whatever is shot into their face).

After a long silence, a 85 year old sheep farmer stood up and said "Son, I don't think you understand the problem. They ain't trying to f#$k them sheep, they're tryin' to eat them."
 
Thoughts and prayers, please…family has declared that we are going to Mammoth Hot Springs today…and maybe taking the long way back to the Madison and stopping @ the fair in Bozeman. I am already contemplating cracking some beers ASAP so that my wife can drive and I can pass out.
 
A Texan was on trial in Montana for beastiality.

His attorney asked him, "At any time during this alleged act, did the sheep in question exhibit any signs of discomfort or distress?"

The Texan said, "No sir, it even turned around and licked my hand."

One of the Montana jurors jumped up and hollered, "A good one will do that!"
 
noharleyyet said:
A Texan was on trial in Montana for beastiality.

His attorney asked him, "At any time during this alleged act, did the sheep in question exhibit any signs of discomfort or distress?"

The Texan said, "No sir, it even turned around and licked my hand."

One of the Montana jurors jumped up and hollered, "A good one will do that!"
Click to expand...
It was so cold in TX this past winter, someone saw a politician with a hands in their own pocket…
 
Ben Lamb said:
Three dudes bellied up to the trough pisser in a bar:

First due finishes up, washes his hands thoroughly, dries them meticulously. "At the Univeristy of Texas, they teach us how to clean ourselves properly."

Second dude finishes up, used just a dab of water, and a dab of soap, then rises with the smallest amount of water possible. "At UC Berkley, we are taught to conserve water."

Third dude finishes up, zips his pants and walks out. On his way he looks over his shoulder and says "At the University of Montana, they taught not to piss on ourselves."
Click to expand...
😂😂😂 that’s a good one.
 
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