We’ve been married 25 years. About 5 years in, I come home to my wife parboiling t-bones. She was banned from cooking any beef except hamburger. I lifted the ban just a couple years ago when she said wanted to put a roast we had in the slow cooker. I come home to find a rib roast, bone side up, in something we have that’s like a slow cooker, but only heats from the bottom. Needless to say, she’s banned from cooking any type of beef other than hamburger again.
Sh*t our wives do...
- Thread starter SaskHunter
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marshman
Well-known member
Mine does this also, but she gave up on the training; she says I am completely untrainable.
ILbowhntr
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I found your post very entertaining. I clearly don’t know you or your wife, but here is another perspective on her lack of skills in the “culinary arts”
Early in our marriage my wife banned me from the laundry room when I washed and dried one of her nice sweaters. It looked like a barbie sweater when it came out. Several years later she asked me to do some wash. Somehow I got a red fabric item in with a load of whites…which resulted in a nice hue of pink on all the whites. Again, I was banned. Oddly enough I don’t have any regrets and zero aspirations to improve my skills in this area. I‘m perfectly happy having her do the laundry.
Is it possible your wife is letting you THINK she can’t learn to cook? Maybe ….maybe not. Either way it sounds to me like she might have you right where she wants you.
duckhunt
Well-known member
Years ago I put some of the wife's bras in the dryer with all the other clothes out of the washer. Yeah that went over well. Apparently you cant dry bras in a dryer, who knew?
geetar
Well-known member
One day when my wife was pregnant and had some raging hormones I get a text when I’m work asking if we have any drywall putty and where it is. I was busy so I just told her where it was. A few minutes go by and my curiosity gets the better of me and I have to ask why. Well apparently she had lost her temper and kicked something on the floor and it made a hole when it flew into the door and she was trying to be responsible and fix it herself. 
ashersdad
Well-known member
In 2014 I was on Kodiak Island hunting brown bears and out of contact with home. My wife's car broke down on the freeway where there wasn't a shoulder to pull off to. So she sat there backing up traffic waiting for AAA and fuming that I was not only unreachable but also spending thousands to hunt bears. When I got home I found out she had ordered a brand new Tesla with all the upgrades. That turned into one hell of an expensive hunt...
jryoung
Well-known member
Her: "Barbara is going to bring us tomatoes"
Me: "Okay, we are booked this weekend though, I'm not sure we have time to process them"
Her: "it's fine, it's only 4 boxes, we'll get up early"
Me: "four boxes as in 50lb boxes"
Her: "yes"
Me: "Okay, we are booked this weekend though, I'm not sure we have time to process them"
Her: "it's fine, it's only 4 boxes, we'll get up early"
Me: "four boxes as in 50lb boxes"
Her: "yes"
noharleyyet
Well-known member
Meh, 50 lbs an hour...get up at 2 am
SaskHunter
Well-known member
jryoung
Well-known member
Yes, because the pepper boxes are slightly bigger than the tomato ones so they can deliver more..... lucky me.Yo dawg, I hate to break it to you but those are Fresh Peppers!!!
454
Well-known member
Mine actually found this slightly amusing but just to be safe I'm making dinner tonight.
Every time my wife was pregnant she went on a super “nesting” phase. I always dreaded the “don’t be mad when you get home”.
best was she tore out 2 whole floors of a mix of carpet and hardwood in s house we had just bought. Planned on doing floors just not that soon. She used a hammer, a screwdriver and a pair of garden shears to pull that off. Hauled it out and was burning it when I pulled in.
worst was same pregnancy, came home to find her putting up a new bathroom vanity. She wanted to surprise me. I walked in and she was mad as all get out, apparently she never learned about breakers and electricity. Said she spent 2 hours getting shocked trying to hook it up. I suggested turning off the light switch to start
best was she tore out 2 whole floors of a mix of carpet and hardwood in s house we had just bought. Planned on doing floors just not that soon. She used a hammer, a screwdriver and a pair of garden shears to pull that off. Hauled it out and was burning it when I pulled in.
worst was same pregnancy, came home to find her putting up a new bathroom vanity. She wanted to surprise me. I walked in and she was mad as all get out, apparently she never learned about breakers and electricity. Said she spent 2 hours getting shocked trying to hook it up. I suggested turning off the light switch to start
shoot, I thought my wife was the only woman who freaks out if I don't load it properly, must be a feminine wife thing that they are all afflicted with....
noharleyyet
Well-known member
Just sayin....
338win
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JohnCushman
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You know what my wife does? Jack $hit because I got rid of her 
shrapnel
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Islander
Well-known member
Teach a wife to cook beef and she feeds you for a lifetime. The basics aren't that hard.
Gellar
Well-known member
And to think some people are polygamists and can live with more than 1 at a time.
