Convincing the wife to move..

[CB1]

So my wife, 4 month old son and I will be heading up to visit Montana in June. Right now the plan is to visit Missoula, Helena, Bozeman and Billings. Now I’ll be honest, I am using this trip as an attempt to convince my wife that we should move Montana. We currently live in Texas and are planning to move in the near future as we want to raise our kids in a different environment.

Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can help sway the decision? I appreciate the help!

 

[riv3rbanks]

I like that plan. Let me know what you do to convince her and I'll try the same haha. I always dream about moving to a western state like Montana or Idaho whenever summer rolls around here in Texas, but I can never make it a reality.

 

[Hilljackoutlaw]

Montana roadtrip in June...as long as she is not blind she should be convinced!

 

[Gunner46]

NOT EVEN going to jump into this disaster set to happen! Tell her straight up what your agenda is...... or plan on moving by yourself. I'm just taking your 6 on this one Bro.

 

[Hunting Wife]

If you are looking to have an honest chance of coming and staying, you better bring her to visit in the winter first. My personal experience with folks who have moved here from southern latitudes is those that didn’t know what the winters would be like, didn’t stay long. It was an expensive mistake.

 

[brymoore]

I left the Midwest 15 years ago. In my case, I was transferred to Philly. When I told my wife, she asked if I quit. I said no, but I will at the end of the month. She smartly suggested I get a job first. Of course I was thinking the West but looked semi-local. At some point she suggested the West from my prompting. Within two weeks we were on a jet for interviews in two towns. I took her with me to feel part of the process. Offered two jobs and took one. I kept my wife part of the process and she agreed to move versus having a serious marriage battle. She agrees moving West was one of our best decisions.

 

[CB1]

I appreciate you having my back @Gunner46. Montana is on our list of places but I want to make sure it climbs that list.

Good point @Hunting Wife. I grew up in Nebraska and lived in Colorado for a few years but she is definitely a southern girl. She has been exposed to some Nebraska winters but I have tried to be as honest as I can about the cold. If this trip goes well I’ll try to get back out again in the winter.

 

[widnert]

What "Hunting Wife" said above. Everyone comes to visit Montana from Memorial Day to Labor Day with their families. Usually great weather and they can't believe so few people have made the jump to live here. So, they do it. What they don't consider is, most years, we get snow the week before Memorial Day (think right now - snow is forecast this weekend) and, we can get snow by the second week of September (last year we were hiking in knee deep snow - second week of archery season). The number of complaints about the winters here from newly transplanted folks is rather high. I just shrug my shoulders and say, "This is Montana, it could snow any month or any day of the year.".

Good luck in your convincing.

 

[SFC B]

In addition to what has been mentioned above I would say you should look about to find the activities and vistas SHE really enjoys. The biggest move I had to make similar to this was a series of military "drug deals" in order to get to CO. I was working in the UK as a civilian but got an offer to be mobilized with Special Forces Command. The deal was that I would do a year at Bragg ( I'll say it an not apologize, that part of NC is an absolute shit hole ) and in return get the golden ticket to Carson. She was all for the move( she spent a year working at Winter Park when "considering her university efforts") but the mechanism was the hard part. The guy that made the offer was a personal friend, previous boss and probably the most genuine and honest man I know. The fact that he PERSONALLY guaranteed this was the only reason she was good with it. I can't even explain how well it has turned out. Better than expected.

 

[Deleted member 28227]

If you are looking to have an honest chance of coming and staying, you better bring her to visit in the winter first. My personal experience with folks who have moved here from southern latitudes is those that didn’t know what the winters would be like, didn’t stay long. It was an expensive mistake.

I’ve never understood how people live in MT, WY, ID, and CO and don’t ski, sled, etc. You essentially have 9 snow months and people want to move to the rockies for the 3 months of summer.

I want to move up to AK, my wife is very hesitant, in the next couple of years we are going to go up in dec for a week when the days are the shortest and see how we feel. If it’s not somewhere my wife is going to be happy living it’s off the table.

 

[Scrappy]

I'm probably not much help here cause it looks like the wife and I are on the 15 year plan.
I talked her into moving from Texas to Iowa to hunt giant bucks back in 2007. Now we are heading out to Montana and Wyoming next month to look around for a good place to move to. Should have just skipped Iowa and went straight out west.

The only advice I can give is if you have a desire to move and the wife is on board don't wait. We only get one turn around this thing called life, don't waste it.

 

[brownbear932008]

Take her to paradise valley and a trip through Yellowstone and then stop at Chico hot springs and take a dip in the pool. She will pick out a house while your there. My first wife did and I damn sure should've bought it when she tried to talk me into it back in 99. What was I thinking....

 

[mthillrunner]

I’ve lived in MT almost all my life. The -35 temps aren’t bothersome, you know you’re staying inside those days. March/April/May can be a never ending grind when it just won’t warm up.

 

[RobG]

So my wife, 4 month old son and I will be heading up to visit Montana in June. Right now the plan is to visit Missoula, Helena, Bozeman and Billings. Now I’ll be honest, I am using this trip as an attempt to convince my wife that we should move Montana. We currently live in Texas and are planning to move in the near future as we want to raise our kids in a different environment.

Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can help sway the decision? I appreciate the help!

A\I would ask her what's important, and then ask us hunters to help you find it! I worked at a high tech company in Bozeman and we had a lot problems getting qualified people. We found a fair amount of interested men, but their wives weren't interested for a variety of reasons generally related to lack of infrastructure.

 

[Rancho Loco]

I’ve lived in MT almost all my life. The -35 temps aren’t bothersome, you know you’re staying inside those days. March/April/May can be a never ending grind when it just won’t warm up.

I second this. Montana Winters are what they are, it's not Palm springs. Pick an activity and enjoy it. But spring is what wears real thing real quick. We really don't get a spring. I suggest visiting in April.

 

[Pondera]

I’ve lived in MT almost all my life. The -35 temps aren’t bothersome, you know you’re staying inside those days. March/April/May can be a never ending grind when it just won’t warm up.

But when it does finally warm up it's awesome!! Truly love living where there are 4 seasons. I could never talk my wife into moving south, for what that's worth.

 

[Mudranger1]

I will say this coming from Florida to Colorado. My wife has never adapted to ehh let's just say 6-8 months of not wearing shorts. I myself have trouble those last couple of months before spring truly hits. We came because my kids had been moved out here otherwise I can tell you 100% we would not be here. The outdoors are awesome but that can be had anywhere as long as you look. I with a couple of the others in that you better make it clear what the intentions are and you will both have to be all in for climate shock

 

[WyoDoug]

So my wife, 4 month old son and I will be heading up to visit Montana in June. Right now the plan is to visit Missoula, Helena, Bozeman and Billings. Now I’ll be honest, I am using this trip as an attempt to convince my wife that we should move Montana. We currently live in Texas and are planning to move in the near future as we want to raise our kids in a different environment.

Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can help sway the decision? I appreciate the help!

Take her there during the summer. That is beautiful country then. Like Wyoming some areas of Montana gets brutal winters. There is a lot of rich history in that area especially Bozeman. You will want to check out the various monuments and that for the Bozeman Trail. A lot of people died on that trail going west back in the day.

 

[MTGomer]

I’ve lived in Arizona for 11 months now. Everyday is a day closer to my wife being out of grad school and hopefully moving back to Montana.
Best of luck to you

 

[LCH]

My wife is always doing something with her sisters or mom. Literally every single day. Shopping, yard saling, sewing, whatever.

I've tried for years to convince her to move west, but I've started to realize that it would probably not be a good thing. She would be miserable away from her family, and no matter how much I might love the move, I guarantee that her suffering would be passed right along to me as well.

In hindsight, I should have made the move immediately. If we had built our lives out there in the beginning, I think she would be happy. Now we're settled, she likes how things are, and any change would likely be a loss for her.

I really think my best course of action now is to enjoy what Indiana has to offer (which is actually quite a bit), and travel west as often as possible. I really do envy those of you that can make your life in the places other people dream their whole lives about just visiting, but it just isn't for everybody.