This chaps my arse!

Sit here:
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Don’t know if I’d have opened it if greenhorn had posted it, that being said it’s still kinda like a car wreck🤷🏻‍♂️

Here Ontario, give this a read:

Lots of good tips in there. Thanks. Think I'll switch to a smelly antiperspirant and kill two birds with one stone ... or rather one stick.
@OntarioHunter
Well, now I don't feel so alone. If the Meateater can talk about it, I'm in good company. I think.
 
I'm with Tiohunter. Simple old Bagbalm. It's cheap, worked on kids and the lanolin will give you a soft butt. Put it on thin after drying it off. A little in the morning and at night.

A common remedy for chapped teats in the dairy industry.
 
No solution to offer, but I wish you good luck in dealing with your moist, wobbly heinie. Happy birthday!
 
@OntarioHunter
In my youth I mixed plaster for a crew of 4-6 plasterers. On slick coat finish days the mixture contained lime. For a couple days after I’d go through a box of corn starch and walked like a bull rider…but the corn starch worked.

The older wizened plasterers said, “you’re galled’d boy, take a good shower, dry off good, and apply corn starch liberally.”
 
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@OntarioHunter
In my youth I mixed plaster for a crew of 4-6 plasterers. On slick coat finish days the mixture contained lime. For a couple days after I’d go through a box of corn starch and walked like a bull rider…but the corn starch worked.
I can remember grandma shaking the corn starch down my pants as a youngster. That and mercurachrome on the skinned up knees, I think I spelled it right.
 
For a real solution… No wearing cotton when it’s hot. Synthetic underwear and stretchy pants make me feel like a new man. I’m anti jeans for anything other than going to dinner or maybe riding a horse.
 

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