Pooping in the Woods - A question of thresholds

[Moserkr]

Vault toilets are absolutely disgusting. I not only prefer the woods, I prefer a grand view too and make it a point to find one. Figure if someone else happens to be glassing me from afar, its their problem, not mine. Ive glassed some hippie hikers peeing in the woods before and the bush they used for privacy from their friends was a fallacy. They would have never seen me by looking up either as I was a ways away. Highly against the surface sh***ers though. A proper minimum 6” burial is necessary.

Saw two deer pee directly into the water of the lake I was getting my water from. And not across the way, the literal exact spot I was filtering from. Nothing to do with this thread, just interestingly disgusting…

 

[dan.kirkpatrick]

once i had a panic need to go,,found a spot,dropped into position,started,,then looked and saw a bull elk not 40 yrds from me,jump up look at me and take off!!now thats funny if i do say so myself.whats a guy to do.

 

[perma]

No issue pooping in the woods.

BUT have you ever dug your hole got into a perfect deep squat, look forward just to see a giant angus heifer and her calf staring at you 20 feet away..... Un nerving to say the least.

Yes but with a rattlesnake instead

 

[KB_]

Yes but with a rattlesnake instead

at least with a rattle snake I can beat the shit out of it with the shovel I'm using to keep me upright. Nothing like getting beat to death with the shit stick.

 

[gouch]

at least with a rattle snake I can beat the shit out of it with the shovel I'm using to keep me upright. Nothing like getting beat to death with the shit stick.

The main thing to check for are yellowjackets. Stomp on the ground, kick any logs, stumps, and bushes. Then look around before pulling your pants down, to make sure nothing is coming at you. It's not a mistake you want to make a second time.

 

[noharleyyet]

8 pages of scatology, and counting. Hunters are sophomores at heart.

 

[OntarioHunter]

Not a group pooper fan at all. Can poop in the woods I prefer not to. I have learned that one may want to look up hill. Sometimes that sage brush may not be enough to provide adequate screening form those in an elevated position....at least it's was guys I had known since middle school and not. Church Youth Group on an nature walk.

Someone gets their jollies watching me crap ... well, that's on them. I grew up in gym class and Army barracks. Exposing my "privates" never bothers me.

 

[mtmiller]

Someone gets their jollies watching me crap ... well, that's on them.

Don't do it. It's just bait....but so easy.

 

[PrairieHunter]

8 pages of scatology, and counting. Hunters are sophomores at heart.

A lot more like teenage girls. Hunters have to have the right brand of clothes, the matching outfits, backpacks, etc. Obsessing over every detail. Jealous as hell if someone has better gear or bigger trophies. Decorate their cars with stickers. Following influencers and buying anything they tell the hunters to buy. Whining about drawing tags, animal #'s, road hunters, outfitters, etc... on social media. Once one hunter does something the rest copy.

Just saying.

Hunters are pure entertainment.

 

[gouch]

Apparently this guy had no problem with pooping in the woods.

MSN

 

[geewhiz]

Apparently this guy had no problem with pooping in the woods.

MSN

Its incredible how well that was preserved. It's as if it were fresh off the....nevermind.

 

[Moserkr]

Apparently this guy had no problem with pooping in the woods.

MSN

Obviously didnt have time to throw it in the fire. Great for science today.

 

[FreezerHunter]

As long as we have this thread, we will never run out of shit to talk about.

 

[BTripp86]

Funny this pops back up, as I have a funny pooping story from this past season. One morning I'm in my treestand, watching the sunrise, when the spicy chipotle chili I'd made the day before starts a knocking. Being no stranger to pooping outdoors I don't panic, but I do grab the wipes out of the pack and shimmy down my tree trunk. Once on the ground and shedding layers, I see a handy dead elm not 20ft away. Thinking I'll save my quads and hang off this elm instead of the usual squat, I plop down and the train starts a moving if you know what I mean. No sooner had my dung thumped onto the forest floor when I hear a loud crack and all of the sudden I'm viewing the world upside down from my back. The damn elm broke on me! Rolling over and standing up, I expected the worst, but miraculously I managed to somehow not land in my chili leftovers as I'd feared. My buddy hunting in a stand about 300 yds away text me asking "what was that?" He'd heard the crack and thud from his position. Once I stopped laughing and got cleaned up I replied "Nothing, nothing at all" but I did tell him the whole story later on. Moral of the story: pick your pooping trees carefully, or just stick to the classic squat.

 

[Nameless Range]

The future is now:

 

[glass eye]

Don't forget to bury it.

 

[ignorethefringes]

The future is now:

View attachment 277275

If I have time to wait for a flying toilet to arrive, I have time to find a restroom elsewhere. This does not solve the, "Shouldn't have trusted that fart. . ." scenario at all!

 

[gouch]

The future is now:

View attachment 277275

I would come out of retirement if I could get a job controlling of one of those things. Someone would go in at the park and come out on the roof of a warehouse along the tracks.

 

[Benfromalbuquerque]

The future is now:

View attachment 277275

This just gave me a great idea and I claim intellectual property royalties if any of you assholes actually does this . But what if: Drone drop camp. Like drone box packed full of supplies drops into a hunt camp site. Or drone drops the supplies at some coordinates. It could work in wilderness too so long as no flight restrictions and the drone doesn’t touch down.

 

[88man]

What’s killing Mount Evans’ mountain goats? A research team is collecting their poop to solve the mystery.

MOUNT EVANS — Lance Carpenter is standing on a lichen-covered boulder somewhere around 13,000 feet, his binoculars zeroed in on the target: the backside of a mountain goat kid. The […]

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all you poopers!