Montana Big Three,,,,,,,,,,,,

[280]

I have decided to petition the State of Texas for them to get the Texas version of Montana’s Big Three. I have decided to call it The Texas 4H. It will consist of the horse, cow, sheep and hog. Some say the last two could be classified as one under the title “swine” but then that could allow the lowly goat and we would not want to comprise the integrity of Texas hunting by allowing such a sad specie. Here is a perfect example of the type of animal we will be looking for http://www.hunttalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27043




I do need help with the rules for The 4H Texas State Record Book under which the above animals will he hunted Texas style, here is what I have come up with so far:


#1 All harvested animals must have been Grand Champion at a local county fair, reserve champions need not apply.

#2 Harvested animal must be deemed “wild as hell” by our “wild as hell expert” Texas Tom.

#3 Harvested animals must be retrieved by a 2WD front end loader. If a 4WD front end loader is required that harvested animal would qualify for special back country/wilderness status.

#4 Harvested animal must have “almost trampled” a banker, attorney or lawyer in a recent failed hunt while the said “hunter” was wearing a three piece suit and wing tipped shoes.

#5 Harvested animal must have worn a 3”x 5” yellow ear tag with a hand written number on it. Number must be written with a black Sharpie.

#6 To qualify a horse may not be wearing shoes.

#7 Slaughter houses under high fence and running hunter operations will qualify, providing the animal was NOT harvested while in a squeeze chute, unless deemed “wild as hell” by Texas Tom.

More to follow,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

[mtmiller]

Fuggin' hilarious.

 

[MarvB]

Gotta hand it to you (for once) 280...in as much as you tend to irritate me with your post of substance lacking random barbs that are nearly always a hanger-on to someone else’s intellect (insert swinging on BuzzH's teat here), you have come up with something that is actually funny, took more than a moments thought on your part, and is even (semi) original! Congrats! hump

...though I am still waiting to see a pic of at least ONE animal you have ever put a dirt nap to....

 

[Spitz]

Now that's quality entertainment!

 

[noharleyyet]

Pretty good 280...maybe your sig isn't a forgery after all.

 

[280]

#8 The “hunter” must genuinely believe his or her hunt was as difficult as a back pack hunt deep into the Montana Bob Marshall, and must accept the use of the 4WD front end loader.

#9 “Hunters” should also be aware that all Texas 4H World Records will become null and void should the U.S> Government decide to give Texas back to Mexico

#10 Use of camo is mandatory, even when “hunting” out of those tall ass blinds that look like small houses on stilts. Ya all gotta blend in, while shooting out of the sliding window

 

[Delw]

Damn 280 thats some funny stuff right there.

 

[Moosie]

HAHAH... someone has been sitting around making up funnies ...

Funny chit man !!

 

[280]

#11 NO entries will be allowed from a "hunter" that is not a least 50 pounds over his Body Mass Index weight

#12 Keith Warren will be President of The Texas 4H Record Book and from this moment on will be referred to as God

 

[280]

#13 Back country camps must have running water and electricty, as Texans should not be required to go with out all the comforts of home while roughing it at hunting camp, who could survive a hunting trip without a blender and margaritas?

 

[Dinkshooter]

What about some rules regarding "halters". Rope or leather? Should they be removed? Before or after the shot? Are they ok in a hero shot?

They sure do come in handy when picking up dead critters with the front end loader.

 

[schelmster]

I like to read a lot but don't post much but this one has me laughing. No offense to any one out there that does not think this sh!t is funny. Keep it up and don't forget about shooting off of the mirror outside of your pickup door shooters.


schelmster