>I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men
>& women differ so much. And I never have figured out the
>whole Mars & Venus thing. And, I never have figured out
>why men think with their head and women with their heart.
>And, I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire
>gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears
>the words "I do".
>
>One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
>passion
>starts to heat up, and she eventually says,
>"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??" So
>she
>says the words that I and every husband on
>the planet dreads. She explains that I must not be in tune
>with her emotional needs as a Woman. I'm thinking, "What
>was her first clue?" I finally realize that nothing is going
>to happen that night, so I went to bed. The very next day we went shopping
>at a
>big unnamed department store... I walked around while she tried on three
>very
>expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to
>take
>all three of them. She then tells me that she wants matching
>shoes worth $200 each to which I say OK. And then we go to
>the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings.
>Let me tell you ...she was so excited. She must have
>thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she
>cared.
>I think she was testing me when she asked
>for a tennis bracelet because she doesn't even play tennis.
>I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK.
>
>She was almost sexually excited from all of this and you
>should have seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go,
>let's go to the cash register."
>
>I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No,honey.
>I don't feel like buying all this stuff now."
>
>You should have seen her face ... it went completely blank.
>I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this
>stuff for a while." And just when she had this look like
>she was going to kill me, I added, "You must not be in tune
>with my financial needs as a Man."
>
>I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during
>the Spring thaw.
>& women differ so much. And I never have figured out the
>whole Mars & Venus thing. And, I never have figured out
>why men think with their head and women with their heart.
>And, I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire
>gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears
>the words "I do".
>
>One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
>passion
>starts to heat up, and she eventually says,
>"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??" So
>she
>says the words that I and every husband on
>the planet dreads. She explains that I must not be in tune
>with her emotional needs as a Woman. I'm thinking, "What
>was her first clue?" I finally realize that nothing is going
>to happen that night, so I went to bed. The very next day we went shopping
>at a
>big unnamed department store... I walked around while she tried on three
>very
>expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to
>take
>all three of them. She then tells me that she wants matching
>shoes worth $200 each to which I say OK. And then we go to
>the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings.
>Let me tell you ...she was so excited. She must have
>thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she
>cared.
>I think she was testing me when she asked
>for a tennis bracelet because she doesn't even play tennis.
>I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK.
>
>She was almost sexually excited from all of this and you
>should have seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go,
>let's go to the cash register."
>
>I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No,honey.
>I don't feel like buying all this stuff now."
>
>You should have seen her face ... it went completely blank.
>I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this
>stuff for a while." And just when she had this look like
>she was going to kill me, I added, "You must not be in tune
>with my financial needs as a Man."
>
>I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during
>the Spring thaw.
