Ithaca 37
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TEN THOUGHTS TO PONDER IN 2006
>
>Number 10
>Life is sexually transmitted.
>
>Number 9
>Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
>Number 8
>Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him
>without an erection, make him a sandwich.
>
>
>Number 7
>Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a
>person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
>Number 6
>Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you
>still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
>
>Number 5
>Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in
>hospitals dying of nothing.
>
>Number 4
>All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
>attention to criticism.
>
>Number 3
>Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars
>And a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
>
>Number 2
>In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
>weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
>AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT TO PONDER IN 2006:
>We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the
>millions And millions of cows in America but we haven' t got a clue as
>to where
>thousands of Illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we
>should
>put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
>
>
>
>Number 10
>Life is sexually transmitted.
>
>Number 9
>Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
>Number 8
>Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him
>without an erection, make him a sandwich.
>
>
>Number 7
>Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a
>person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
>Number 6
>Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you
>still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
>
>Number 5
>Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in
>hospitals dying of nothing.
>
>Number 4
>All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
>attention to criticism.
>
>Number 3
>Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars
>And a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
>
>Number 2
>In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
>weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
>AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT TO PONDER IN 2006:
>We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the
>millions And millions of cows in America but we haven' t got a clue as
>to where
>thousands of Illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we
>should
>put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
>
>
