Is it worth it?

[44hunter45]

Brian
You are not alone.

My job was once considered the best, most flexible, job in my corporation. After years of lay-offs there are not enough of us to cover the work now. Wages have not kept up with inflation. The phone rings constantly and the offshore dispatchers treat you like work in Bhopal. I got home at 0100 Tuesday morning and the phone was ringing when I came in the door.

I was raised to give 110% to whatever you do. I hate that I've come to a place where I don't care any more.

I've been having this same internal debate for some years now. I'm close to retirement and will either suffer until I make it, or I'll get laid off. I threaten to quit at least once a day.

 

[maxracx]

For the past 4 years I've been in a job that pays well, but has always been a little more than I can handle. I've had difficult jobs before, but always been able to hang in there and eventually develop a rhythm and keep my head above water. This one, in 4 years, I've never quite gotten there. Now I'm just kinda burned out, and worn out, and just don't really even do the things that drew me to this line of work in the first place. On one hand it's been a blessing because the bills are paid and we have plenty extra money to save away, donate to charities, and get things we want (within reason) without having to worry about it. However, I'm pretty much just exhausted all the time, don't sleep well, and feel like I need to be in 5 places at once constantly. I can take retirement in about 4.5 years, but a lot of days I just don't think I can keep it up that much longer.

I have a possibility to step down into a different job that we be far less stress, but about a $4 - $5 an hour pay cut. Our finances are such that we could absorb that, but I'm having a great deal of psychological dissonance over it. I've always worked with the philosophy that I'm always going to do the best I can, put in for every promotion, and provide for my family. Now I'm looking at willfully taking a step back. It's hard.

I don't know. I'm not sure why I'm posting this, maybe just needed to air it out a little. I'm in a mid-management position in the state Probation and Parole division of the Department of Corrections where I just get it from all sides. Always some kind of drama and problems with no good solutions. I've done some good in places, but I'm not sure its worth it anymore. The voices in my head tell me to suck it up and be a man, but I confess my heart is not in it anymore. I'm just doing it because it pays well. There was a time years ago when I felt this profession was sort of a calling. Man those days are gone.

I will keep my reply short.....You live in one of the most beautiful places in the world. $5 per hour X 2080 hours in a typical work year equals $10,400. Can you be happier, less stress for $10K a year?? Only you can answer that question. Best of luck to you on your decision.

 

[brockel]

I took a $6/hour cut this year to take a less stressful job. Completely worth it. I enjoy things now that always seemed a hassle before. I’m not such a crabby asshole either

 

[Mallardsx2]

If you want a high paying job you have to be able to handle the stress that comes with it.

I would approach your boss and see if you can get your workload lifted a bit by getting someone to help you through things. Rome was not built by one man.

 

[OntarioHunter]

Guess I can sing with this choir. I'm retired US National Park Service but also accumulated a lot of other careers along the way. Fortunately my brief US Army service in the 70s set me up for education and job security. I have a PhD and various jobs included policeman, HS teacher, crane operator, horse packer, law clerk, truck driver, editor, and other stuff. Mostly I thoroughly enjoyed my work and devoted myself ... probably too much. Mostly I worked for idiots who didn't have a clue, especially about people management. That was especially true in the NPS. Screw up and move up is certainly the way things work in the Park Service! I loved my work, especially as a ranger. But I hated working for the NPS. It was almost impossible to do excellent work. It's the thing incompetent managers fear the most. Unfortunately I'm ethically bound to do my best. Too proud to do anything poorly. I stuck it out even though I was away from my family for extended periods. We kept hoping I'd find the right fit so my wife could leave her job at the university. I think she loved the national park scene more than I did (especially Alaska!). To make the story short (which is very atypical for me!), I eventually just had to throw in the towel with the NPS. I switched to US Navy and was hired without even an interview to be the historian for US Navy at Pearl Harbour. It was a management level position with tons of travel (Pacific battle sites) and my wife could go with me. It was a dream job that was scheduled to start after the new year 2010. But our son died unexpectedly during the night at Christmas. Then my wife in a car accident the following Thanksgiving. I never was able to work after that. Now I have more money than I could spend in two lifetimes but I'm so very "unsettled". Retirement is an empty life relatively speaking. Perhaps there is a downside to having lived the dream ... it ends too soon.

So it's difficult for me (or anyone else really) to give you advice, Brian. This is a decision you and your family need to make together. But whatever you decide, NEVER look back. At the end our marriage took a big hit after Wesley died (very typical unfortunately), and she was looking for excuses. The failed NPS career was an easy target. My fault. But I reminded her that she as often as not found the jobs for me! It was her dream too. So if/when you decide to step down (or not), that needs to be 100% a mutual no pressure decision. When we choose to have families our lives aren't our own anymore (are you smokers listening?). There's no longer a line in the sand about what's mine and what's not. Family life is a circle, not a straight line. Whatever the decision, the path will not be an easy one simply because it's new ... or not. Life is about choices. Make it and move on.

 

[Ben Lamb]

Brian,

There is a lot of really good advice in this thread, and as someone who has spent the last 8 years on call 24/7 for clients, I know what you're feeling. I've missed a lot of opportunities to enjoy myself by being there for others. The financial security is awesome, but at the end of the day, you can't take that cash with you.

My father used to say that money is a tool, not a god. I have a tough time remembering that sometimes when the payday is big and so is the workload. I'm in that situation now, where I'm working 60/week & not hunting nearly as much as I'd like.

At the end of this, you need to do what is right for you & your family - and generally that means reducing stress & finding balance in order to have a quality home life. Talk to your managers, let them know how you feel and see if they offer recourse. If they can't, then I think you have a good opportunity to reclaim your life. Work is important, and we put a lot of self-worth into what we do for a living, but again, at the end of your time, you aren't going to wish you worked more.

Signed,

On call workaholic.

 

[matt0550]

I could just turn off my phone, but there are some unwritten expectations.

Those unwritten expectations are at the heart of the problem in your profession and other similar professions. Example - while "off duty" AND not being compensated you take a call and after processing information you render a decision (from the middle of a 1.5 mile stalk). The decision proves to be poor in the end based on your failure to perceive intel correctly due to your obviously divided attention. The employer then may feel a need to discipline you for this poor decision you made while half tuned out and again "off duty". I can tell you from an entire career of this gamesmanship in medium sized government that unwritten expectations are a well established tactic and plan utilized from the federal government on down to all but the smallest of villages. There are policies and procedures, contracts, unions, wage and hour divisions due to of this type of constantly uncompensated work and unwritten expectations. When the employer has an expectation, they should adopt it into the P&P - but they often wont because they know darn well they trample the line between work and "off duty" to their advantage when it suits them. If you perform work, you need to be compensated UNLESS there is an agreement entered into stating otherwise.
Don't let "loyalty" play a role in this decision you are considering - do what is best for YOU and you alone.

Now I know someone(s) will take exception to what I have stated - im not saying EVERY government job and field...it is pretty specific to certain job fields - but where it exists, its nearly rampant.

 

[Dan O]

Brian I understand your problems. I spent 28 years as a Deputy Sheriff in central Mt. I saw the issues with P&P and knew many of the officers. Your line of work can be described as nothing less than frustrating because your working in a system that your clients are not of good character and the higher up's are political appointee's that will toss you under the bus. You should meet with your supervisor and set up a on call system so when you have time off your really OFF the job. Several should participate in this arrangement so your only on call once a month. Personal issues are a nightmare no one thinks of when your get promoted. It's a eye opener for sure. I learned that their issues are theirs it was my job to help them move forward but not my place to make it my issue. I was on call 24/7/365 for 6 years as the supervisor of the L.E. side of our agency. The other Captain in our agency was responsible for the detention side of our office. That position had it's own set of challenges. I was glad I was where I was at and not over there.
Communication with your supervisor is essential to working through the issues you can't keep it on your shoulders alone. You need to work out a viable solution or it will eat you up. If any of what I've said helps or you have questions on feel free to send me a PM and I would be happy to talk anytime.
Dan

 

[Sytes]

Tough gig. Medicaid... budget decimated, case workers overloaded and P&P overwhelmed - It's a run on sentence. Communicate with your Supervisor.
A whoop-load of great advice though the best of all I've seen thus far;

you can't keep it on your shoulders alone. You need to work out a viable solution or it will eat you up

Live to work or work to live. This was shared with me when I felt compelled to work with little end in sight. It was building... and building. I left one LE position and entered Federal LE. I now have the time and $ from work to enjoy much more of my family and my own life.
Sounds as though you have a passion for your duties and that is a hard found value. If your supervisor(s) are not receptive toward your concerns, move your passion elsewhere.