Subject: pivotal event of societal evolution
>
> The division of the human family into its two distinct political
> branches occurred some 10,000 years ago, when humans coexisted as
> members of small bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers.
>
> The pivotal event of societal evolution was the invention of beer.
> This epochal event was both the foundation of modern civilization and
> the occasion of the bifurcation of humanity into its two distinct
> subgroups: Liberals and Conservatives.
>
> Once beer was discovered, it required grain, and that was the
> beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can
> were invented yet, so it was necessary to stick close to the brewery.
> That's how villages were formed.
>
> Some men spent their days killing animals to barbecue at night while
> they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of the conservative
> movement.
>
> Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting, learned to live
> off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly barbecues and
> doing the sewing, fetching and hair dressing. This was the beginning
> of the liberal. An interesting evolutionary side note: some of these
> early liberal men eventually evolved into women.
>
> Liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the trade
> union, the invention of group therapy and group hugs, and the concept
> of democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that
> the conservatives provided.
>
> Over the years, conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest,
> most powerful land animal on earth.
>
> Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.
>
> Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer
> white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their
> beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal
> fare. Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women
> have higher testosterone levels than their men.
>
> Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers
> in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the
> designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher
> also bat.
>
> Conservatives drink domestic beer; They eat red meat, and still
> provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo
> cowboys, lumber jacks, construction workers, medical doctors, police
> officers, corporate executives, soldiers, athletes, and generally
> anyone who works productively outside government. Conservatives who
> own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.
>
> Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the
> producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe
> Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the
> liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America.
> They crept in after the west was tamed and created a business of
> trying to get MORE for nothing.
>
> Enough said...
>
> The division of the human family into its two distinct political
> branches occurred some 10,000 years ago, when humans coexisted as
> members of small bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers.
>
> The pivotal event of societal evolution was the invention of beer.
> This epochal event was both the foundation of modern civilization and
> the occasion of the bifurcation of humanity into its two distinct
> subgroups: Liberals and Conservatives.
>
> Once beer was discovered, it required grain, and that was the
> beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can
> were invented yet, so it was necessary to stick close to the brewery.
> That's how villages were formed.
>
> Some men spent their days killing animals to barbecue at night while
> they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of the conservative
> movement.
>
> Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting, learned to live
> off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly barbecues and
> doing the sewing, fetching and hair dressing. This was the beginning
> of the liberal. An interesting evolutionary side note: some of these
> early liberal men eventually evolved into women.
>
> Liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the trade
> union, the invention of group therapy and group hugs, and the concept
> of democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that
> the conservatives provided.
>
> Over the years, conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest,
> most powerful land animal on earth.
>
> Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.
>
> Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer
> white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their
> beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal
> fare. Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women
> have higher testosterone levels than their men.
>
> Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers
> in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the
> designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher
> also bat.
>
> Conservatives drink domestic beer; They eat red meat, and still
> provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo
> cowboys, lumber jacks, construction workers, medical doctors, police
> officers, corporate executives, soldiers, athletes, and generally
> anyone who works productively outside government. Conservatives who
> own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.
>
> Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the
> producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe
> Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the
> liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America.
> They crept in after the west was tamed and created a business of
> trying to get MORE for nothing.
>
> Enough said...
