2fastnaz
New member
"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole
relationships." -Sharon Stone
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a
son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson
"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in
poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are
apparently doing quite well for themselves." -Jerry Garcia (Grateful
Dead)
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives,
but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." -Barbara Bush
(Former US First Lady)
"Ah, yes, divorce, ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a
man's genitals through his wallet." -Robin Williams
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't
like and just give her a house." -Rod Stewart
"On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other
hand, we can open all our own jars." -Bruce Willis (On the
difference between men and women)
And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything
on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything
on Satan." -George Burns
"Luge strategy? Lie flat and try not to die." -Carmen Boyle
(Olympic Luge, Gold Medal -1996)
"There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane:
Either you have diarrhea, or you're anxious to meet people who do."
-Henry Kissenger (US Secretary of State)
"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said,
"Thyroid problem?" -Arnold Schwarzenegger
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men.
Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." -Tiger Woods
"Things you'll never hear a woman say: 'My, what an attractive
scrotum!'" -Patricia Arquette
"Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment
turns the state into a gay dungeon-master." -Rev. Jesse Jackson
"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the
only time of the month that I can be myself." -Roseanne
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable
undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other
women. They say that women are too judgmental, whereas, of course, men are
just
grateful." -Robert DE Niro
"Having sex at 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." -George
Burns
"In the last couple of weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra.
Is that really a problem in this country? Men not paying enough
attention to women's breasts?" -Hugh Grant
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are
having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe
swelling. So what's the problem?" -Dustin Hoffman
"When the sun comes up, I have morals again". -Elizabeth Taylor
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think,'I
know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.'" -Jerry Seinfield
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only
enough blood to run one at a time." -Robin Williams
relationships." -Sharon Stone
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a
son-of-a-bitch." -Jack Nicholson
"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in
poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are
apparently doing quite well for themselves." -Jerry Garcia (Grateful
Dead)
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives,
but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." -Barbara Bush
(Former US First Lady)
"Ah, yes, divorce, ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a
man's genitals through his wallet." -Robin Williams
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't
like and just give her a house." -Rod Stewart
"On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other
hand, we can open all our own jars." -Bruce Willis (On the
difference between men and women)
And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything
on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything
on Satan." -George Burns
"Luge strategy? Lie flat and try not to die." -Carmen Boyle
(Olympic Luge, Gold Medal -1996)
"There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane:
Either you have diarrhea, or you're anxious to meet people who do."
-Henry Kissenger (US Secretary of State)
"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said,
"Thyroid problem?" -Arnold Schwarzenegger
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men.
Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." -Tiger Woods
"Things you'll never hear a woman say: 'My, what an attractive
scrotum!'" -Patricia Arquette
"Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment
turns the state into a gay dungeon-master." -Rev. Jesse Jackson
"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the
only time of the month that I can be myself." -Roseanne
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable
undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other
women. They say that women are too judgmental, whereas, of course, men are
just
grateful." -Robert DE Niro
"Having sex at 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." -George
Burns
"In the last couple of weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra.
Is that really a problem in this country? Men not paying enough
attention to women's breasts?" -Hugh Grant
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are
having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe
swelling. So what's the problem?" -Dustin Hoffman
"When the sun comes up, I have morals again". -Elizabeth Taylor
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think,'I
know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.'" -Jerry Seinfield
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only
enough blood to run one at a time." -Robin Williams
