The Viperess
New member
A fellow was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs.
due to very serious health risks. As he wondered how
in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for
a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM.
"Guaranteed like hell," he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them
up and subscribes to the 3 day/10 pound weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands
before him a voluptuous, athletic, beautiful, 21 year-old woman, dressed in
nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes, and a sign around the neck. She
introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign
reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing
and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.
After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way
this company does business!" The same girl shows up for the next two days, and
the same thing happens.
On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10
lbs. as promised.
So, he calls the company and orders their 5 day/20 pound program. The next
day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but
Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: "If you catch me,
you can have me."
He's out the door after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but
when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. She is by far the best he's
ever had. For the next four days, the same routine happens, and much to his
delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20
lbs. as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7 day/50 pound
program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone.
"This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies. "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door, and when he opens it, he finds
Richard Simmons standing there, wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a
sign around his neck that reads: "If I catch you, I can have you."
due to very serious health risks. As he wondered how
in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for
a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM.
"Guaranteed like hell," he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them
up and subscribes to the 3 day/10 pound weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands
before him a voluptuous, athletic, beautiful, 21 year-old woman, dressed in
nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes, and a sign around the neck. She
introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign
reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing
and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.
After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way
this company does business!" The same girl shows up for the next two days, and
the same thing happens.
On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10
lbs. as promised.
So, he calls the company and orders their 5 day/20 pound program. The next
day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but
Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: "If you catch me,
you can have me."
He's out the door after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but
when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. She is by far the best he's
ever had. For the next four days, the same routine happens, and much to his
delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20
lbs. as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7 day/50 pound
program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone.
"This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies. "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door, and when he opens it, he finds
Richard Simmons standing there, wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a
sign around his neck that reads: "If I catch you, I can have you."
