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Interesting quotes Monday

"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill
 
He was a wild one, old Hatchet Jack. He was livin' two year in a cave up on the Musselshell with a female panther. She never did get used to him.
Del Gue
 
"I was going to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I have no character"
-Charles Barkley
 
" What a doctor I've got-he's really mixed up. Last week he grabbed my knee and told me to cough. Then he hit me in the balls with a hammer."

Rodney Dangerfield.
 
Marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start you just need two hearts and a diamond. At the end you just want a club and a spade.
 
Better to be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.
Abraham Lincoln

We had a refrigerator magnet with that quote on it when I was a kid. You would think that I would have learned it better than I did.
 
"You can take a good look at a butcher's ass by sticking your head up there, but wouldn't you rather take his word for it?"

- Tommy Boy
 
"My first wife told me that if I brought home one more coon hound she was gonna leave. Wouldn't you know she lied, it took me five more hounds before she'd pack and head."
An old buddy
 
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